Transforming painful relationships into rewarding ones. Here we are actually looking at the dynamics of our "inner" self - in a form we can see in our outer world. When we heal our relationships, we heal ourselves.
Problems exist between people when there is a lack of communication. We must ask ourselves - "why" is there a lack of communication? When we see other people as "separate" and apart from ourselves, we erect prison bars around our heart. When we recognize our unity with others and begin to feel "with" them instead of separate and apart from them - the joy of being together comes naturally. When we see ourselves as being "here" in our own existence and others as "there" in a separate existence we deny the truth of our "oneness" with all people, with life and with God.
Forgiveness - letting go of ideas of sin, guilt and evil - is the key to healing relationships. Jesus said, "Love your enemies, do good to those who spitefully use you and bless those that curse you." He was showing us the formula for resolving painful human relationships and bringing about inner and outer peace - he was showing us the healing power of "love". To focus on the purity and perfection of those we are prone to "judge" - to see there "inner" Light is that which must occur to heal our relationships.
Mentally visualize the people in your life with which you struggle to maintain balance. Embrace these people, look them directly in the eyes and tell them you love them. Do this five minutes a day, each and every day and one of two things will occur. Your relationship with these people will clear up or they will leave your life. When we feel conflict between ourselves and another person, we need to first seek to work out these feelings "within" ourselves. We need to visualize the person, send them love and light and "feel" what it would feel like if they were our friend.
Relationships are lessons in tangible form that are necessary for our own personal growth. Prejudice or judgments towards character traits, actions and things that we don't like are drawn to us are drawn to us so that we can learn to "let go" and love. The quickest way to free yourself of someone who does something that irritates you is to love and accept them just as they are - with their innoying traits. People we find hard to accept become opportunities for us to practice understanding and forgiveness.
When we enter into a relationship we have one of two attitudes. "I am going to get something from this person" or "I am going to share with this person". The first leads to pain, the other to joy. One seeks to get, the other to expand - sharing works, taking doesn't. The love and freedom that we give another to grow and expand are returned to us many times over. It is faith which allows us to see the possibility of goodness in someone who does not recognize it within themselves. All healing is a result of "inner" forgiveness and spiritual love.
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